anni05's Diaryland Diary



it's not like it matters, but I haven't gotten a birthday card in the mail from my maternal grandmother yet. I don't need one or anything and she owes me nothing, it's just that it makes me wonder if the time has come where moms entire side of the family is going to stop talking to me since I cut her out. I've been waiting for that. all my life, no one has ever taken my side. I have always been told I'm ridiculous and I deserved the abuse for this reason or that. it all comes down to people thinking I owed my mother anything--to give her my hard-earned money to keep me (I was her daughter, not her fucking roommate) or to do all of her chores in order to deserve to exist. I disagree with all of this. children are not supposed to be born for a purpose, like to do things for you. children owe their parents nothing, they didn't ask to be born. you're supposed to have children because you're willing to love and take care of THEM. and you don't stop being their parent the second they turn 18, it's not automatic permission from the gods to start emotionally and verbally abusing them. selfish people should be made sterile. i think too many people have children because they think it's what they are supposed to do.

anyway, I'm always the one on the outside looking in so I'm used to it. but at least now I don't have to live with people who think they have the right to treat me like the dursleys treated Harry Potter. I know that's a stupid reference but I always related to him. I've always wondered how he managed to grow up so well-adjusted and without any mental illnesses. wild.

12:27 pm - 05.29.21


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